I have a compulsion that I'm going to reveal. It's something that naturally happens in my mind. It doesn't stress me out, particularly. I do it in seconds. I do it every day, all day long. It doesn't interfere with my life, as I see it, mainly because I can do it so quickly and … Continue reading Quiet Compulsions
But who celebrates the Motherless child? Who remembers the Grieving sibling Whose life was missing Love and comfort Or the children Riddled with the loss Of she who bore them? Who loves the Worn down souls Unable to open Computer tops For fear of seeing Everyone else's joy As they Sit alone. We are conditioned … Continue reading For the Motherless Child
but if you don't want it, the full heart and the thriving; if you are wound tightly inside the cusp of your victimoness, afraid that if you shine no one will notice, your hands will grow bruises and your fingers will become weak from gripping so deeply to the pain. change has to rise in … Continue reading Ethereal Strings
I am relaxing on a soft, off-white, leather couch. There is someone sitting on either side of me. My legs are stretched out in front of my body, and my head is resting comfortably on the back of the plush couch. I am laughing and talking with my present company as I watch the people … Continue reading Why Did You Just Kill Me?
The rest of U/us say goodbye sometimes; go inside to hide, and they've let Me rise. She used to enjoy My presence. This time it's mere necessity. I am the Keeper of many secrets, information she is seeking. When the going gets tough, I come. I accept the temporary situation, but soon, it will be … Continue reading Mind Mercenary
"You're crazy." How often have you heard this phrase thrown around, either flippantly, in jest or to victim blame someone who has overcome or is recovering from abuse? I heard this often as a post-cult teenager and well into my adult years. While I was actually dealing with the behavioral aftermath of being an extremely … Continue reading Born Crazy: A Video Poem
There's a faded line Between reality and time I Catch myself remembering rejection Straddling a log fence watching Them play and laugh and shout Odd girl out Too loud I used to be an expert at stilts Stride the mud like a queen I could do anything If I just believed but I never prayed hard enough to Make God real and It would be a version of Drop Dead Fred who Emerged the memories in my head Read more...
When I was a little girl of one and two years old, I existed inside of a perspective attached to my sister's hip. She is four years older than me. It seems I was always either hiding behind her hip or holding onto a part of her belt loop or dress so I could feel … Continue reading Because Humans Represent The Possibility Of Loss
Tell me what you lost. I don't know, Pictures of smiles And baby girl bows? Tell me what you lost. Everything that made me; Memories, time lapses And cultural gaps. Why do you seek? Because I got lost; Erased every time I Dissociated beyond. Where are you now? I am here. Abstract entity. Infinite infancy. … Continue reading Tell Me What You Lost
Insomnia / wish I could sleep / but I'm awake / avoiding / the heater is too warm but I don't feel like moving to adjust it / I have errands to do today, and here I am 4 am / unable to sleep I should write here more / but I'm often avoiding / … Continue reading Streams of Consciousness – 1
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