"butterflies do not spring from silken cocoons
to fly their beauty into the blackness of tombs."
from cult survivor to thriver...
You came to this planet pure.
You were violated.
You can become your own rebirth.
Many abuse survivors find solace in writing out our experiences. It is important to have support through this process. Writing out trauma memories is essentially re-living the experience again.
Creative outlets are extremely cathartic for abuse survivors. Utilizing creativity can give us an avenue to re-direct the emotion that we carry. The more we work through our experiences sometimes the less we find ourselves re-experiencing the effects of the trauma.
Another important aspect to thriving is to understand how abuse can dictate our behaviors. Once we can recognize our own negative behaviors such as anger projections, passive aggressive tendencies, outbursts and self-abusing behaviors such as addiction, we can begin to change them. One barrier to accountability can be shame. We must remember that we have nothing to be ashamed of. Our abusers are the ones who should be ashamed.
Another important aspect to thriving is remembering to love ourselves more than anything. We should take time to take short walks in nature, watch our favorite funny movies, laugh and most of all, define our own boundaries. If we like time alone, that's alright. If we don't like to be around too many people, that's okay. No one else gets to define our current comfort zone but ourselves. Learn your boundaries and your triggers. Be willing to stand your ground. Reach to those who have agreed to hold space for you should you need an ear.
You can thrive after religious abuse. You can deprogram your mind away from the negative diatribe in your head and the behaviors which seep through. You can do the work. You will get through the pain. You will come out feeling more free and grounded inside your own critical thinking mind.
Another interactive journal that I found to be extremely helpful due to it is well written and has simple tasks to help open the mind further to introspection is:
Survivors of religious abuse can have a long journey of recovery. There are many layers to uncover and work through. Recovery from this multi-layered level of indoctrination, physical and psychological torture is a very independent path because of the vast differing factors surrounding this level of abuse. Please refer to the definition of religious abuse to understand why this abuse is often the deepest level of abuse to sift through in recovery.
It should be clarified that there are many perspectives in regards to healing from doctrine based abuse. I can only share my own journey. I cannot apply it to your life or your experiences. The journey through understanding this type of abuse and how to heal from it can be a very long and painful one. However, once a survivor decides to take this journey, the result can be amazing freedom and a level of functioning that is tailor made to exactly who YOU are as opposed to who someone told you that you could be.
One tool that is largely used by child abuse survivors is writing. "Becoming Gratitude" is an interactive journal that I designed first to use for myself as a way to begin opening my mind to a positive perspective of the world. Sometimes we trauma survivors often need things to be simple. Therefore, I recommend this interactive journal specifically because it takes a mere five to ten minutes of the day. I do mine in the evening. To experience what this system can do for you, click below to buy my journal.
"Becoming Gratitude" by Vennie Kocsis
"PTSD: A Time to Heal" by Cathy O'brien